I literally couldn't think of anything that would be that much more fun or
refreshing than just going out socially interacting doing game doing take up
whatever you want to call it I mean it's a blast you're a very intelligent what
are you doing with a scanner like me what are you doing this the girls that
you're very attracted to the game will just come out of you
you want to be doing pickup for social interaction way that you love doing in a
way that feels good in a way that's amazing you just be yourself and let it
flow Wow it's Ellen from real social dynamics welcome to the Golden Gate
Bridge in San Francisco it's a beautiful night out here actually it's really
foggy out so you could hear these horns that the different ships are blowing out
it's actually bouncing noise back so they don't crash into the waves and I
thought it was really beautiful so I want to start a video here for you
tonight and what I want to talk to you about is actually something that I'm
very very passionate about and then it's actually how as an introvert okay
somebody who loses energy by interacting socially you can actually learn to gain
energy by talking to a lot of people or picking up girls so what I want you to
imagine is that you're somebody who you know really really depleted when you go
out for a night you go home may be feeling kind of crushed or you know you
go home feeling kind of dejected or tired or burnt out from pickup but
imagine if instead you go home feeling so fucking good that you didn't even
wanna go to sleep like it's almost like you're drunk except you're sober you
know I do that for me actually I'll come in really smooth like no effort at all
you can even over loud even talking you know yeah look you're really good watch
it
your neck penis Aviva
I'm very passionate about this for a few reasons one of them is because a lot of
introverted guys are really great people and I honestly think they deserve to
meet somebody and they deserve to have a great dating life and they're oftentimes
hindered by the fact that they're not extroverts and they feel drained after
talking a lot of people so like you know we say you're a good dude
yeah let's offer a girl but you just get tired talking all these people right and
I'm passionate because I want to show guys like that actually had to change
that around but I'm also passionate about it because you know I hate
sounding judgmental but you know if you've watched my videos you know that
I'm not exactly a big fan of drugs and alcohol I think some people can use
these from time to time like in a kind of ceremonial type sense like
celebratory type sense but I'm not a fan of having to do that on a regular basis
in order to go out and socialize and meet people so what I find is that when
I go out is like I said it's almost like I'm drunk but I'm sober I'm just
laughing and having fun with everybody I'm joyous it's not uncommon that I'm
actually the person who looks like they're having the most fun there and
then who is having the most fun there and I'm completely sober and people
really admire that making me very
you're being ridiculous yeah
I find that when I go out pickup has a very relaxing calming and rejuvenating
effect on me to where I go out at the start of the night and maybe I'm
stressed out from work or I'm stressed out from things that are going on and by
the end of the night it's like a healing I feel almost a healing like I've
already to face the rest of my work week I'm ready to face my challenges I feel
like I've connected with people I feel like I've connected with myself I've had
so much fun at the start of the night I might feel a little bit introverted or
kind of tired or not social and really not enjoying it so much but by the end
of the night I feel fucking incredible now the reason that I want to share this
with you is because I filled it in the pickup community so many guys quit
because they get burnt out with it and they start to think that it's like some
kind of chore or you know some kind of kind of like you know this like horrible
experience that kind of burns them out and I think it's very important not to
get burnt out on pickup because if you're getting burnt out on it you won't
keep doing it you won't get good at it you'll just be miserable and I don't
think sex Eddy sex is enough of a payoff to do something that you hate so pick up
when done right is actually bringing energy up in you it's actually healing
you it's actually making you feel amazing and what I want to do is
actually teach you very unique insights that took me years and years to figure
out so you can gain energy from pick up and have longevity in the game you know
you care this bye-bye she morning
I did I'm good how are you you're very intelligent what are you doing with a
scoundrel like me what are you doing with this girl just kiss me hmm the
three main principles that I'm gonna teach you right now are number one don't
think about whether or not to approach use that same mental focus on just how
to do the actual approach the approach is assumed okay so don't think whether
or not you approach just think how to approach the next one is don't try so
you don't need to go up and do a song and dance do a song and dance you don't
do the song and dance for the girl dude okay don't even try just go up be
yourself as they say and I'll explain this one later cuz I realize that gets a
little bit dicey okay so I'm gonna explain it a bit later and the last one
is don't judge yourself in any way shape or form every approach that you do is a
thousand out of ten okay preposterous ly good is how you're judging yourself in
the race you're not judging yourselves cuz who the fuck would have the balls to
do that who the fuck actually has the balls to do pick up while they're sober
so for you guys so what do you think about these three principles here's how
I want to break it down for you with all of them you're noticing that you're
trying to get away from burning mental energy you want to think of willpower
basically as a muscle it's like a chemical in your brain and you don't
want to be burning willpower you want to be helping your willpower so if I sit in
a restaurant they put bread on the table the first thing that I say is get the
bread off the fucking table because I don't want to burn that limited
willpower chemical in my brain resisting the bread okay well in the same way when
I see a girl and I think should I approach should I not approach should I
approach should I not approach what am i doing I'm burning out my mental muscle
so what I do instead is I just go do a quick approach I just thought well how
should I do it is she walking that way okay I'll cut ahead a little bit and
I'll you know I'll approach her from that angle so I'm thinking what I want
not what I don't want like oh it's gonna feel bad or I'm gonna get rejected I
don't care about that I'm just thinking how do I do it so I'm not burning mental
energy thinking should I do it should I not do it should I approach here should
I not that's a burning your mental energy or gonna drive yourself fucking
crazy just go say hi for two fucking seconds boom it's great that says
what are your options are getting in there see I'm not thinking should I go
in should not go in yeah I'm thinking should I sit at the tables at the chair
beside them should I pull them out yes should I pull them on the dance floor
should I do a little funny salute shy do a backwards high-five
should I yell them shut compliment them all my energy is going into how should I
do it I'm not a randomizing it whatever comes naturally it's probably I'll do
but if I start thinking should I or shouldn't I what's gonna happen it's not
good right so I don't know I'll try I'll try saluting them is stupid okay but
it's just like first beam of mine
now the second one is don't try and when I say don't try what does that mean
that's that's really dicey right you think you're gonna get these like two
press guys that are negative and they're gonna go they're gonna be like I didn't
try I didn't try why didn't it work it's not that I'm saying don't try I'm just
saying like you just go in and chat right and what you'll find this other
girls you're not attracted to you'll kind of do okay but what the girls that
you're very attracted to it the game will just come out of you it just comes
out it's like honestly it's the craziest thing it's like if I get a beautiful
woman at one of my seminars god I do an amazing seminar so what I do is I'll go
to girls that aren't that attractive and I just chat and that puts me in a frame
that I'm not trying to game everybody at burnin mental energy and it puts me in
this nice relaxed frame right where I'm very much being myself and I kind of
ease into inner alignments well then what happens when I get a girl who I'm
really attracted to is it just flows out it is very very effortless how dinner go
loves it I'm doing a mint tea like not a caffeine just like I'm in like I think a
mint
yeah is this shawl or scarf is that a scarf anime shirt and of course I got
totally your shawl
okay that's clever Oh gross oh my god disgusting it's cool dissipating so what
Apple is like you remember earlier the night I was little more discombobulated
here more centered so nice centered energy why did that happen
cuz the whole night I've been doing that seven it's a very non tri-state I'm so
engaging I'm very engaged but I'm not like going I'm not like sitting here
with a hamster in my head like how do I better like how do I do it how do I do
it right I'm not like that and what's happening is is that I'm just
I'm at peace I bet peace I'm sitting here and I'm not
trying to win or get anything I think she's cute I'm absolutely willing to
talk I'm just clearly sitting here that's a good enough indicator of inter
I feel and I'm engaging with her but it's not like this like desperation
anything like that right so be myself I'm in no way self criticizing cuz I
assume I'm awesome and I mean you know even right from the get-go I have known
just going so you've got a situation look at the first two components right
the first one is I'm not thinking whether or not to approach I'm just
doing it but the girls are not that into it's just a very quick approach to time
out but the girls that are intimidatingly beautiful I might do a
quick approaching him out it might have not have gone amazing but at least I did
it and I feel good about myself that I at least did it so I'm building momentum
okay and then basically because I'm not trying it flows out now the last one is
I'm not judging myself I want you to really stop and be honest with yourself
about how much mental energy you burn judging yourself after a pickup in fact
her every interaction that I did I was like oh god this wasn't good that wasn't
good she didn't like me oh I feel so bad about myself every time that I did pick
up I thought that I couldn't imagine how much mental energy I'd be burning so in
my case I only judge it as good I knew every set that I did I view it as good
it's like if I have a child and one child is disabled and the other child
I love them both the same why because my creative energy that went into it I
don't judge it it's better good anything that I did I judge that's good
because otherwise you burn yourself out look how much energy I have compared to
how much energy you have look at you you look like you're like I don't keep doing
this I'm tired I just had several girls go by me that it didn't even fuck it
open how do I learn
so my view because I even had the balls to say hi at all I view it as I view it
like most people wouldn't that's my perspective I was like hey pleasure
I knew that as good how many guys would have the balls to do it I just sit
without drinking how many I mean some but very few right yeah so what what is
my choice to focus on self-judgment or should I focus on the fact that I went
in and chatted what should I focus on okay now is my energy going up or down
because I don't like that exactly it's actually going on so that's the thing is
for playing the game in a way where we're not losing energy we're gaining
energy it's all through our interpretations of whether or not we're
going to gain or lose energy for interpreting it as a personal offense
then you're gonna get fucked up if you're interpreting it as you know you
did it an approach you talked somebody and who would have a pulse to that your
energy goes up yeah yeah we got it let's look at this side like right behind you
guys right that's an awkward one you know she's like right there with the
dude I'm not even able to have to whisper she's even on the fucking phone
look at that she's on the fucking phone how fucking weird is that but I could
still just go say hi for two seconds and it like look at my heart rate right now
it's probably pretty normal if I were to just go in and say hi even if it's gonna
be bro she's on her phone she's with this group be weird and awkward
so Swiss no word spoken once nope
okay yeah now put these three components together and what's gonna happen you're
just seeing a girl do a quick approach you're out um you're not really trying
so you're just kind of being yourself you're getting to a natural relaxed
social momentum because I think with introverts we overthink it and we burn
ourselves out and the last one is where you're not judging yourself as bad
you're always judging it is good because who the fuck would have the balls to
approach at all most guys don't have the balls to approach at all it's not so
cold approach pickup is this thing every guy can do so you give yourself
compassion and what I find is it with just those three simple steps I wind up
going out I approach a bit and it goes decent I approach a bit it goes more
decent I approach a bit it goes good I approached a bit it goes amazing and by
the end of it I'm in this nice relaxed state where every girl that I see I'm
just talking to maybe not every girl but like a lot of them you know I'm just
talking I relax I'm not being a try-hard I'm letting the personality kind of a
rise out and then I'm always judging myself as good so my self-esteem is
going up and up and up cuz I'm like a my only criteria for success is that I
approach at all and by the end of it I'm feeling fucking amazing and that is what
I want to see for you as well do you member what I said earlier about letting
go well that's the thing is like a lot of Eastern philosophy teaches this which
is that like the I mean in Eastern philosophy they get a little woo with it
but they say like you know the divine presence or the present energy is there
but stop trying to control it let it possess you so what I do a public
speaking event for example I really just get out of my own way but to be fair if
you're new it's like like you know you never talked to a girl before just get
out of your own way it's not the most helpful advice you know you do need some
step-by-step but if you're wondering how I'm doing that it's yeah it's like I've
done it enough to get the general step-by-step and then from there I'm
getting out of my own way just say leo I've dreamed about the smaller
Titanic ever since I shared that Leo then yes look at the lamb blip and the
dad barn Leo does not go bad but that's all you need to know and just be like
yes Dario this purely imaginary
that's amazing look okay it's called a topknot yeah okay I thought that was
something at home by the way those horns are also not real now again though it's
coming back to energy because you're asking why is this energy flowing
through well the three principles that I always teach you for energy is don't
think whether or not your approach put all that on how to approach you're not
burning energy don't judge yourself view it all it's good so you're not burning
energy and then you don't even need to try it because the girls that you like
better you're gonna do a better job soon operating energy and then as you're
socializing you're getting more in the moments so almost like a great
meditation session where you're getting more and more present by the end of you
like god I feel good game is an even higher degree of that it's like it's
like meditation on steroids because it's like an active meditation where you're
getting more and more out of your own way and then you're giving and there's
so much Energy's giving out and then the girls are giving energy back and it's
just like so you know that's the guys that are really great they have a great
night out I call that like sober or like or drunk while being sober or like high
while being sober so I mean a lot of guys say to me like Tyler you know why
aren't you into like drugs and booze and I'm like dude typically I'm having more
fun than the guys that are drinking or getting high how what are you 25 that's
a good age what do you do I'm in graduates what are you taking I am
getting my MFA what is that
so even smart hoes like the man bun that's good
even smart hoes love we can cry together perfect a car feet and we can draw a
line in the sand of the beach and then the waves will wash it over and then we
can cry again like tomorrow yes tomorrow
this girl is the mother she's pulling me she's quite she knows what she wants and
how to get it alright hope you enjoyed this crazy weekend um you probably
noticed that I have so much fun on these things it's almost insane I mean I
literally couldn't think of anything that would be that much more fun or
refreshing than just going out socially interacting doing game doing pickup
whatever you want to call it I mean it's a blast it's it's a huge hobby for me
honestly just about anything in my life I could trace back my success to the
amazing emotions and just like great feelings and refreshment and nourishment
and almost like life blood or water that I get from doing game pickup socially
interacting whatever it is that you you don't want to call it now you'll notice
here that the major focus that I've taken is on longevity okay in other
words this is something that you can do as a lifestyle not as this temporary
little thing so if you look and say it died for example you know some guy might
will power his way through chicken and broccoli for a month and it's like okay
yeah I could do this I'm a tough guy look at me I'm a tough guy I'm eating
chicken and broccoli I'm so tough but dude you're not gonna eat chicken and
broccoli the rest of your life it's gonna drive you nuts it's gonna run you
down so what do you do let's say that first month you get really inspired
you're doing a hard diet over that month you teach yourself how to cook and as
you're teaching yourself how to cook more and more maybe you incorporate
coconut or maybe incorporate avocado or rock a cow or spices or things like that
and after a month or two all of a sudden things you know how to cook tastes so
good that your healthy diet becomes a lifestyle so get away from pickup being
this like powering through the pain and kind of thing right get away from that
like just running it down get away from that it's okay to do that at first
that's why we make videos about that about finding the willpower first cuz it
is very hard at first sight I get that completely but as time goes on I will
you just shift your focus to longevity okay I've seen other businesses that
will do these things that get them you know a lot of success early and they're
kind of burning themselves out but they're not doing it as a sustained pace
I know for me even in real social dynamics as a business everything that I
do I want to maximize it but I want it to be at a sustained pace okay so I'll
kind of wrap with that idea and the basic idea you know Stephen Covey talks
about this it's in the seven Habits of Highly Effective People he calls it the
P versus PC balance that's production versus production capacity you want to
produce but you don't want to kill the Golden Goose okay so you want to push
yourself but if you push yourself to the point that you don't want to do it
anymore you'll stop you want to be doing pickup or social interaction a way that
you love doing in a way that feels good in a way that's amazing the way that's a
blast so think about again not just producing
pickups but doing it at a high production capacity where it's fun it's
nice you enjoy it every single little thing that you're focusing on you're
doing it to make yourself have longevity and fun in it look at the rules you do
but you do an approach not whether or not you do should I shouldn't I should I
should not burn yourself don't know just how to do it you go do it nice look at
the rule it's not do I do it was it good enough to I judge myself was it bad no
it was always good look at the rules am I gonna put on a song and dance so if I
put on a slogan Jeff so this person know you just be yourself and let it flow out
as you're doing that you feel amazing you feel really good I'll see you out
I'll make eye contact with you I'll be having fun I'll see you I'll look in
your eyes you'll be having fun loud like a little silent understanding that we're
both loving life and life will be good anyway hope you
enjoyed the video I'm off to the Warriors cows Finals game tonight should
be good and I'll talk to you soon peace
the fire came round I was ready to slow part of this journey you see an
opportunity at a fucking action you align your full self towards the goal
you want to be much help promotion or use it once and think I can go right not
to mention origin because people think that they want to move only part of the
monsoon look the other part of them lost a second
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